Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Entry 1-19
I was warned that the hardest thing was going to be staying focused. That is true, but in more ways than I ever imagined. This morning I realized that prayertime, journaling, reading, etc are not the focus. God is. I get so wrapped up in what I'm trying to do that I forget the real reason that I'm doing it.
Having said that, my prayertime was much better than it has been all week. But I also realized that the now familiar peace that I start to experience is also not the goal. It's just the first awareness of His Presence, like the first gray hint of dawn. I've felt something of God's Presence in the past, He's spoken to me, even once in an audible voice, but I'm starting to understand that there is infinitely more. I can't say much else.
At some point I had to question the point of journaling. What good are words in the Holy of Holies? This may seem contradictory, but that is why the Bible is so precious to Christians. When you realize what it really is, calling it the Bible or Scripture seems inadequate, and expressions like "the Word of God", "Our Daily Bread", and "The Sword of the Spirit" start to acquire real meaning. The image of food and sustenance is apt, particularly when our own words and thoughts fail. Human speech, ordered in the heavenlies, can convey much more meaning, but there is a catch. Imagine hacking your way through a jungle and suddenly coming upon a modern superhighway. There is even a car there waiting for you. Now you need to learn to drive.
Having said that, my prayertime was much better than it has been all week. But I also realized that the now familiar peace that I start to experience is also not the goal. It's just the first awareness of His Presence, like the first gray hint of dawn. I've felt something of God's Presence in the past, He's spoken to me, even once in an audible voice, but I'm starting to understand that there is infinitely more. I can't say much else.
At some point I had to question the point of journaling. What good are words in the Holy of Holies? This may seem contradictory, but that is why the Bible is so precious to Christians. When you realize what it really is, calling it the Bible or Scripture seems inadequate, and expressions like "the Word of God", "Our Daily Bread", and "The Sword of the Spirit" start to acquire real meaning. The image of food and sustenance is apt, particularly when our own words and thoughts fail. Human speech, ordered in the heavenlies, can convey much more meaning, but there is a catch. Imagine hacking your way through a jungle and suddenly coming upon a modern superhighway. There is even a car there waiting for you. Now you need to learn to drive.
papijoe 6:54 AM
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